I am currently being driven insane by an industrial cleaning van that has been parked outside the house. Goodness knows what it is industrially cleaning but the noise from the generator thing has got inside my head and is in danger of making me cry.
I am struggling with a place to get comfortable and do computer type work. We have a lot of space here but I can’t work out where to put myself. I think this is largely because I share the house with someone who tends to commandeer all available space with ’stuff’. This means he’s all set up in the living room with his laptop and surrounding bits of black plastic which I can’t quite identify but apparently need to be out. The spare room is his walk in wardrobe plus he has his own room (yes a whole room all to himself) which is jam-packed with DVDs, CDs, other computer type stuff…hmmm, I feel I may be getting a raw deal here.
So I end up on the sofa with my laptop on a cushion on my lap which is far from ideal. I think my task for the day is to go and see if I can identify a small spot I can set up so I can have my laptop and papers out at the same time and with the possibility of the comforting chattings of Phil and Fern in the background. Hmmm…
In the mean time, I must seek out more headache tablets and hope whatever is being industrially cleaned is soon up to the required standard because I will go mad.
I keep promising myself I will do this but live an extraordinarily grumpy life so have decided to make it more of an ‘occasional’ feature - hopefully weekly. So here goes…
1. The smell of rain on hot pavements.
2. So many people wrote really kind things on my leaving card at work. I was only there a very short time but most of the messages were really personal and when I look at them I can believe I’m good at what I do.
3. The Beloved picks some bright, sunny flowers from the garden and puts them in a vase in the kitchen to brighten up my day. I remember he can be so kind and it makes the tough times we often go through seem a little bit more worth it.
So finally got round to seeing SATC on Saturday morning. There’s something that feels a bit naughty going to the cinema in the am but then we all need a bit of naughty indulgence now and then. There were only four people in the cinema and - because they had allocated seating - we were all sat next to each other! Eventually we moved so we weren’t in each other’s laps (because there’s something a bit icky about watching a sex scene at the cinema when you’re on your own and so is the man next to you - call me old fashioned I know. Actually why was there a single man watching SATC? Strange stuff).
I really enjoyed it but then I really enjoyed the series, it wasn’t as funny as it could have been, some parts were far too predictable and it took product placement to a whole new level. But hey it’s fun not a cerebral exercise.
I was on my own this weekend so managed to get quite a lot done. Had to do mad frenzy cleaning as my parents are staying the night tomorrow and I am constantly wracked with the fear that my house never quite reaches my mum’s standards of cleanliness (mind you I work full time, she doesn’t and she has a cleaner).
Also spent quite a lot of the weekend being ranty at the television, especially the news. I cannot add anything original or intelligent to the debate about Zimbabwe but it’s a heart-breaking situation. I really wish Mandela would speak out. I know he has left politics behind him and will soon be retiring from public life (he’s 90 and deserves to put his feet up) but this is a subject on which he could have a powerful voice. In the spirit of “If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem…” then by NOT speaking out African leaders are condoning Mugabe’s treachery (and just don’t get me started on the crappily ineffectual Mbeki).
FOOTNOTE: Not entirely sure a post should start with SATC and end with Mugabe but hey, the random blitherings of my brain never could be fathomed
I’m very excited because I’m going to the launch party for the Real Food Festival this evening which promises a good deal of sampling of free food and drink plus I can learn how to skin a rabbit (okay I probably won’t take the opportunity to actually try it myself) and apparently there is ’sheep entertainment’, a concept which is highly exciting - although I would prefer pig entertainment as porkers are my favourite animals (sheep are slightly stupid).
Unfortunately I can’t get to the debate but I’m hoping that they will put it online or at least do something with the outcome because cheap food is costing the earth and there’s a lot of whingeing at the moment about the price of food going up. I’m not saying that people aren’t feeling the squeeze* but as a nation we are now spending less on food than 30 years ago, in fact just 10% of our disposable income which is also less than our neighbours in Europe (who spend on average 20%) - let alone the rest of the world.
I suspect ethical food is a very middle class preoccupation but it really distresses me that most consumers are so divorced from the reality of where their food comes from and have an expectation that they should eat meat every day and that they should be able to get apples (or tomatoes or asparagus or indeed anything else that is SEASONAL) 365 days a year and all for rock bottom prices.
I’ll stop before I really start ranting…
* I understand that a credit crunch is a specific economic phenomenon but I suspect the UK media are creating a self-fulfilling spiral of economic misery frightening people into feeling poorer than they actually are. Also - and I’m going to sound like a Tory here and I do apologise because I’m not - people taking responsibility for their own profligate spending/credit should not be bailed out by the government or the banks. Again financial responsibility (like social responsibility and where your food comes from) should be learnt as part of a holistic education from parents and in schools. Okay now where is that copy of Socialist Worker?
So I spent yesterday getting in touch with my ‘inner self’. Went to the Global Retreat Centre of the Brahma Kumaris which possibly sounds a lot weirder than it actually was.
The centre is the most amazing 18th century Palladian villa which - given that the organisation is funded entirely by donations - is an incredible feat. The ethos is that volunteers will take better care of a property than ‘paid’ workers and from seeing the theory in action, it’s hard to disagree.
To stick to the physical, our lunch was amazing. At the beginning of the day, we were given a little speech about the ethos of the house and the facts that waste is not tolerated and our lunch would be cooked with love. Well love is very tasty (as was the chickpea soup, super proper chapattis and apple pie).
The meditation was very relaxing and the content was extremely interesting. I think I may have to assimilate it all a little more to really understand and/or decide whether I can really believe it all. Certainly the second session on spirituality freaked me out somewhat but that possibly has something to do with my rather unformed views of life, the universe and everything.
Came away feeling positive and determined to meditate (every day), hmmm…haven’t managed it today which is fairly poor. Need to reschedule and make that extra time in my day which is - in theory - easier because at least it gets light earlier (on dark mornings you have the scenario of 15 extra minutes in bed or dragging your carcass out of the duvet and trying to concentrate on your inner being - guess which one wins?). Well the spirit is willing, I just have to get the flesh co-operating.
So to the material…
Stayed in a really nice hotel last night. No matter what the star rating, it’s the little things in a hotel which make me feel warm and cosy, for example Molton Brown toiletries (always a winner), saying you have forgotten your toothpaste (therefore asking where is the nearest supermarket/chemist?) and being given a little dental kit; cotton wool balls and cotton buds in the bathroom (much under-rated and always appreciated); a free bottle of water (because you know you can’t really drink the water out of the bathroom taps). Just those little things that make you smile (or - if you’re me - make you squeal entirely unnecessarily but quite joyfully). However, on the down side, the room was far too hot which made it stuffy and has not entirely helped ye olde cold.
And then to the realms of ridiculous in the material world. A house two doors down and exactly the same (in terms of layout) to ours has just been put up for sale for the most ridiculous amount of cash. I am actually quite scared about it. In theory it’s a good thing but in practise I am concerned that this house turns into £ signs rather than what I consider its primary focus: my home. I swore when we moved here three and a half years ago that I never wanted to move again and that still holds true. I wonder if that has contributed/is contributing to some rather inappropriate behaviour on my part.
I am so bad at blogging at the moment. I would like to blame an exciting social whirl and a fascinating jet set job but I can’t!
It has been a bit of a struggle getting back into the work thing. I started this job so quickly that I didn’t have time to sort out any admin so I feel like I’m constantly behind. I think I need to do a nine day fortnight so I can actually get stuff sorted out at home. Especially as the light problem is continuing…for the past few weeks bulbs have been blowing on a fairly regular basis which is worrying and annoying. Fortunately most of them are just bulbs but the transformer went in the dining room - electrician job, and the main strip light in the kitchen has a very specialist bulb that you can’t find in normal shops - grrr!
It is good being back amongst the gainfully employed though and I’m excited about getting paid this week (well till I realise how much the taxman will have nabbed).
I’ve been spending a tad too much time on Facebook but it is really useful for keeping up with the friends I made in Africa - can make you into a nosey old madam sometimes though!
The main reason I haven’t been blogging is that my brain seems very full up of non-interesting things and there have been very few glimmers of anything that could pass for an original thought for a while. Whilst Christmas remains a frightening prospect in most ways, I am looking forward to having a few days of just being able to think a bit (well outside of the confines of tube rage, work panic, and domestic drudgery).
Why would you want to wash a turkey? Beats me.
I am feeling rather smug because I have ordered all my Christmas food (although Ocado - “we’ve released new delivery slots” - have let me down which is v annoying). It’s a pretty low key Christmas this year though with just me and the Beloved. I don’t think either sets of families are delighted but we just want a Christmas without everyone looking at us because no matter where we go, we do feel as if we’re being scrutinized and we’re under enough pressure as it is. Despite it’s low keyness, the bill is still rather disturbing which is a bit of a mystery as Christmas dinner is - in effect - just a poshed up Sunday roast and neither of us like mince pies, Christmas pudding, Christmas cake etc (it’s a dried fruit thing rather than a bah humbug thing honest). I’ve even resisted the overwhelming ‘need’ for Twiglets and Bendicks mints although I’m sure I’ll cave on the latter at some point.
Rather foolishly I am attempting to do my remaining Christmas shopping this evening. I had meant to go last night but spent the day feeling horribly sick and the prospect of battling with shopping hungry crowds did not aid the digestion at all. Actually though the shopping may not be too bad tonight as it seems about 75% of people will be at Christmas parties, well I live in hope! I haven’t got too many things to get. The one advantage of falling out with most of my family this year means the Christmas present buying and the Christmas card list has been significantly shortened although I do seem to be buying an inordinate amount of presents for children - why are all my friends so intent on producing? At some point I really do need to make a conscious decision to STEP AWAY FROM THE PRESENTS FOR SMALL PEOPLE.
So it was a bit of a shock to get a phone call yesterday offering me a job and asking if I can start tomorrow - eek! Obviously delighted as Jeremy Kyle was beginning to do my head in (although will be missing Deal or No Deal which is strangely addictive). Plus of course the bank balance will be grateful for a cash injection after nothing but withdrawals since I went to Africa.
I’m trying not to count my chickens because this could just be a temporary state of employment but I have spent most of the night making mental lists of “things to do today”. This of course means I’ve failed in my first task: have a lie in (obviously not helped by the Beloved’s bizarre morning routine which involves waking up horribly early). Obviously there’s no life or death things that HAVE to be done today but life is accompanied by a lot of admin some of which is tricky to fit into a working day. I may actually still have to take a half day for admin next week because it’s the sort of admin (dr and electrician) that can’t be done in an office.
This working full time lark (something I haven’t done for over a year) is a bit of a frightening concept.
